Archive for the Bone to Pick Category

GMA has laser eyes!

Posted in Bone to Pick, News, Politics with tags , , , , on February 5, 2008 by Leonard

by Leonard Cervantes

This article also appears in Kapisanan Blog

lasers!!!!

In a speech she made today, President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo (GMA) said she is “focused like a laser” on moving the economy forward, not on politics, in the wake of the ouster of her estranged ally, Jose de Venecia Jr. (JDV 2), as House Speaker in the NBN Scandal.

You might be asking yourself a few questions:

1. Why did GMA say “focused like a laser”. Man, that’s so corny pinoy it bothers me.

2. What’s this new NBN scandal again? Again!?!

3. Who is Jose De Venecia Jr. (JDV 2) and why was another person ousted from the government again?

4. Why in the blue hell are there SMA (so many acronyms)?!?!

Especially for 2nd-Gen Filipinos living abroad, navigating around the confusing and complicated world of Philippine politics is almost impossible. Even if you are brave enough to try and read an article from ‘back home’, you’ll probably be overwhelmed by all the names, terms, and system of government (or lack thereof) that so differs from what we have here.

That’s probably a good explanation why the majority of us aren’t aware of Philippine politics. How can we have an opinion if we don’t understand how it works, or how it’s supposed to work in the first place? What we need is someone to break it down.

Strap on your seat belt and concentrate really hard — I’ll do my best to make sense of it all…

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Don’t es-STOP. Bel-EEEBin.

Posted in Arts & Media, Bone to Pick, Entertainment with tags , , on February 4, 2008 by Leonard

by Leonard Cervantes

This is old news, but just in case you already didn’t know —

journey-2008-11.jpg

Legendary rock band Journey has a new lead singer and he’s PINOY! If you don’t know who Journey is, you are probably:

a) a youngin
b) too cool
c) too cool for school

The members of Journey ended up flying Arnel to America for an in-person audition and they signed him on the spot as their new lead singer. It’s the ultimate Cinderella rags-to-riches story and would have been the perfect ending — if not for the racist reactions of some Journey fans.
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Over-Romanticizing the Filipina

Posted in Bone to Pick, Politics on January 29, 2008 by Leonard

by Leonard Cervantes

amosolo.jpgWoman By The River – Fernando Amorsolo 

Today I saw one of my old college classmates on the subway. He’s a Trinidadian guy and we had fun at school talking about whatever things we have in common — not much actually, but we’re both island folk in our own way.  At one stop, a pretty Filipina girl got on the train and sat next to us, then got off a few stops later. Right after, my friend turns to me and says, “GUY. I LOVE FILIPINO WOMEN.” 

My first instinct was to pummel him and I didn’t know why. As soon as I snapped out of it, my over-critical, somewhat-political mind started to swirl between replies of “Yes, they ARE great.” and “But WHY do you ‘love’ Filipino women?”  Continue reading

Renaldo — 14 minutes and counting

Posted in Arts & Media, Bone to Pick, Entertainment, Jokes, guy. on January 23, 2008 by Leonard

It’s been a week since Renaldo Lapuz shocked the world with his infectious tune and it looks like he’s already fading from view.

your brodder

His ‘official’ website is up for auction and while he’s still ‘hot shet’ in the blogosphere, mainstream media seems to be on the next thing already.

I promise that this will be my last post regarding this unless something ridiculous happens next, but I did want to comment on a few keen observations since what I like to call “Lapuz-Gate”. Continue reading

Tarantino’s Barong is so Wrong

Posted in Bone to Pick, Entertainment, Stuff on January 3, 2008 by Leonard

by Leonard Cervantes

This news is sort of old, but worth posting anyway.Quentin’s Ba-Wrong

The Golden Globes are coming up and the latest news is that they are trying to negotiate to let the show go on via striking an independent deal with writers.

Bigger news to me was that Quentin Tarantino took to the podium before the holidays to annouce the Golden Globe noms — and he was wearing a barong tagalog. The day after, Defamer blog posted comments about Tarantino’s messy un-kept look.

All I gotta say is, don’t blame the barong! We all know Quentin Tarantino isn’t the most ‘kept’ man on the planet. In fact, aside from being a brilliant co-opter (thief) of Asian and other cult film influences, he actually nauseates me. I do have to give him props for rocking the barong though… it’s an unappreciated work of fashion art that deserves to be recognized for its elegance as formal attire.

If you look at the photos online, you can easily tell that Quentin got the barong look all wrong. I should know, I wore one at my wedding and instituted a barong style code for the men — one of the smartest moves ever, garnering compliments from all our guests. For Quentin Tarantino and any other Hollywood fashionista thinking of sporting our national garb, here are a few do’s and don’ts on wearing the Barong Tagalog:

DO

1. Do Wear a Shirt Underneath – No one likes nipplage showing beneath those pina fibers. Plus, your nipples don’t like rubbing embroidered patterns (do they?) Continue reading